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Halo Quin

~ Author, storyteller, witch

Tag Archives: Honesty

Black Candles and White Witches

31 Wednesday Aug 2016

Posted by Haloquin in Enchanted, Magic, Reflections

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

black candles, darkness, Devotion, duality, Honesty, light, Living Life, Magic, musings, paganism, perceptions, Philosophy, reasons, Star Goddess, Tools

I recently bought black candles. This is not unusual. What makes this time notable is the look a friend gave me. A raised eyebrow, a smile both excited at the possibility of something taboo afoot and nervous that I am perhaps more wicked than I appear.

A little later the in-laws came to visit. Afterwards I remembered that the black wax, half melted, stands clearly visible on my altar and may have elicited a feeling of worry in this instance too. (True to British form, nothing was said even if it did.)

We have a pattern, a story we’ve learned, one of duality. Of Good vs Evil, of Kind vs Wicked, of light vs dark. I am a witch. I am a healer, first and foremost, – though I heal through inspiring joy and creativity (I hope) more than fixing physical ailments – which labels me a lightworker. And I honour, every day, the fertile darkness of sleep and dreams and space, and of the earth which nourishes all that we are.

The black candle on my altar is not there for wickedness, it is there for the darkness that carries the promise of light.

Incense

 

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Some Faery Philosophy

04 Thursday Feb 2016

Posted by Haloquin in Faery, Philosophy, Reflections

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Faery, fairies, Honesty, Imperfection, inspirations, Journey, Magic, musings, Pagan, pagan theology, paganism, Philosophy

Pandora's Box by JW Waterhouse

In my heart of hearts, I’m a philosopher, which means that I like to have thought through logically the reasons behind my beliefs. (This is sometimes like opening Pandora’s box… so here’s a disclaimer; these are my beliefs and thoughts, so I don’t expect everyone to agree with me by any means, I’m not out to convince anyone! I do find it interesting to hear why people think and say what they do though, so let’s have a discussion!)

In my last post I talk about pondering Faery Theology (there has to be a better word for this… any ideas?) so, by way of preliminary thoughts, here is an extract from chapter 3 of my book “Pagan Portals; Your Faery Magic” wherein I ponder the nature of faeries (as I see them) and the value of working with them.

 

If we look at the stories of Faeries, all the myths and legends, we see a common theme; they are all very strongly connected to, or embodying, nature. They are not, however, merely the plants or trees or forces they embody, they are beings that are inherently magical, beyond limits. Faeries are natural magic and, as part of nature ourselves, the magic within us is fey.

Humans are lured into Faeryland by beauty. Beautiful music, beautiful visions, beautiful food. And this beauty, once we return to earth, we pine for. So Faeryland is that place within the world, and ourselves as part of nature, in which the sense of magic, wonder and beauty lies, the natural core of our being. The heart of the world we reach through connecting to our Faery Heart.

If our hearts, at their untamed core, are places of beauty and magic, then following the call to Faeryland will open our hearts again to the beauty of the world. If we learn to touch the fey parts of ourselves then we can move through our lives open to the beauty that surrounds us and so we can reconnect to the natural world, with the other beings on the Earth as our brothers and sisters and kin.

…

And, of course, we recall the other parts of the stories of the fae…the wilder parts…the dangerous parts… They are untamed and not human and so their ethics are a little less strict than ours tend to be. In our heart we are natural beings, just like them; we have learnt really wonderful human skills, such as compassion and language, but in our search for order we have tried to tame our essential Selves and instead we have locked them away. These parts of ourselves hurt, so each day we die a little inside.

Here we choose to walk down a path that will lead us back to the parts within us that hold who we truly are. We seek all our parts, those that are good at communication, at compassion, and those that are good at standing up for us and being free. We do not have to give up the gifts of humanity in order to find our Faery Hearts and heal our lives, we can free ourselves of those things that do not serve us, release those things that hold us back and fly, carrying both gifts of humanity and gifts of Faery. We can choose to be both human and wild. That is what it means to be fey.

Fey means free. Free of the locks we’ve used to keep ourselves acceptable and free to choose to move in compassion and beauty. Fey means to be free to be our real Selves, to live our lives without unhealthy compromises, to dance to Faery music so we are filled with love and joy and deep feelings of connection even in a business meeting or on a busy, grimy underground train.

Fey means so full of shiny, happy, beauty, that you cannot help but share it.

Faeries are the conscious manifestation of the wild magic of the natural world. At our untamed core we are also part of the world, so part of our heart belongs to the realm of Faery… in which case, those of us that find our hearts singing with that wild magic? We are Fey. And when we allow ourselves to express that magic in ourselves we feel happy and we can share that happiness with the world.

It is always important in the stories to be respectful and to cultivate a good relationship with our “Good Neighbours” with whom we share a kinship, and the stories are where we first learn how to approach this people. In the same way we must learn to respect the wild world around us, to take only what we need and not deplete the land and her resources.

Growing up I was taught that the trees are conscious and aware. I was taught that the plants have feelings which deserve to be respected. I was taught that non-human animals are people just as we are. I learnt that the world around me was alive and the spirits dwell within everything. I have to eat to survive, but that doesn’t mean I don’t need to say thank you.

We are given masks to wear in our lives, but I have seen that we are much happier when we learn who we are under the masks and choose which masks to use and which to discard… and when to cast them off entirely and dance under the starlight with our friendly cousins.*

Book Cover YFM

 

*And it’s good to know which cousins bite, or don’t want to dance with you! You might swim in a river you know well, or cuddle your childhood canine-friend but you wouldn’t swim in a storm-tossed sea, or pick up a wild-wolf-cub with mamma wolf about to pounce, now would you? The Fae are the spirits of the wild, with all that entails.

 

Oracles and Completion

28 Friday Dec 2012

Posted by Haloquin in Art Craft and Beauty, Enchanted, Faery, Reflections

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Art Craft and Beauty, challenge, Completion, creativity, Faery, Faery Queen, Feyhearted path, Heart, Honesty, Imperfection, Journey, Magic, musings, oracle cards, process, project, Strangeness of Life, Tools

Not so long ago a parcel arrived in the post. It was addressed to A World Enchanted. I was so excited! I spent months putting together a deck of Oracle cards and for almost a year I’ve been using one I printed myself… now I have a professionally printed deck and three to sell!

My Oracle Deck!

The Completed Deck!

I’m really proud of my work and the printed cards are beautiful. It works perfectly for uncovering what is in your heart and the heart of the world and the simple readings I did for others were very well received.

And somehow I’ve completely avoided posting about them here. I haven’t put the 3 decks I have for sale in my shop, I haven’t told you about them properly, I haven’t done anything with them beyond using them for myself.

Why?

Despite how it may appear, I struggle with being visible. I struggle with putting my work out there and allowing it to be seen. I struggle with completing projects and releasing them into the world. Artworks contain such a part of the artist’s spirit that an entire deck of my art makes me very visible and so, sharing them, I feel very vulnerable.

This New Year I am considering ‘Wholeness’ as my word for 2013. A word that includes the concept of completion and of being whole in myself. A word that speaks of safety, strength and holiness. Sacred Completion. A guiding light to help me overcome this block and share more beauty with you.

And today I am posting my Oracle Decks in my shop. There is more to do to complete this project than put the information up, however. I need to spread the word. I need to share this beauty, be seen, be known. So here I write and contemplate where to share with others what I have done!

Oracle Deck Set for sale

The FeyHearted Oracle and Guidebook!

Here is the page on A World Enchanted for the FeyHearted Oracle Deck for your enjoyment. If you feel called I would love for you to share this page with your friends and anyone you think might enjoy the deck!

May you find it easy to complete the things you wish to do and share your gifts with the world!

Map Making Step 3 – An Enchantress is… Fae

28 Wednesday Nov 2012

Posted by Haloquin in Enchanted, Faery

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Enchantress, Faery, Faery Queen, Feyhearted path, Honesty, inspirations, Magic, Map, musings, process

Moving through the darkness
Light a candle
Say a Prayer
Sing your wishes to smoke on the air
Music lingers
Notes unsaid
Kisses from Angels
Of deep black and red.
The Waterbound lady
Holds out a blade
Choosing wishes and dancing
Or the quietest glade.
~Halo 15/11/12

An Enchantress is… One who enchants;
One who brings beauty, healing and delight to those around her.

One who works magic of the Fae.
One who brings beauty to the world.
One who causes change.

What do these mean?

First, ‘the magic of the Fae’ asks the question, who and what are the Fae?

Being Fae, 
from my writing project ‘Faery Steps’

Words weave strange tales, a vision of what is and was and will be…

Fey; adj. Mysterious and strange, ‘fated to die’, ‘visionary’ and ‘mad’.
Fairy; from faierie (Middle English); the realm or characteristic activity of the faie; enchantment.
Fay; from Faie which evolved from fata (Latin); one of the ‘Fates’; i.e. a spirit
(Courtesy of Wikipedia!)

‘Fey’ and ‘Fay’ have different roots, words which have come to be connected through the resonance we hear and thus cousins. We, as strange mortals who see beyond the veils, become fey and thus fay. Fey is the human that is visionary, seeking magic and the world’s beyond. The Fay are those that live beyond the material, that shape the land and guide the growing things, the spirits who weave the destiny of each living thing. Untamed and wild, their ways are often different to our but strictly governed by their own code of conduct. The first rule of conduct is ‘Honesty’. Honesty with oneself allows you to know who you are, what you want and how your subconscious will effect your choices in ways that support or contradict your conscious choices. Honesty with the Fae is firstly a matter of respect – if you break your word to them you show you do not respect them – and secondly it shows that you can be trusted. Without honesty you cannot trust yourself to navigate the brambles to the Well of Vision and the Fae will not trust you to deal fairly with them.

As a word for the land, the act of enchantment and now the people who enchant, ‘faery’ reveals to us the interconnected nature of all three. As the fate of nature Faery is that which must be, the blueprint and soul of the natural world.As seekers of the land of faery we become visionaries, we become fey. In becoming fey we become fay and thus faery. This, in turn, connects us to the land that is Faery and we join the magic that moves through the realm that gives shape to the world we walk.

We are the realm of magic. Our hearts beat out the rhythm that shapes the world.

My Beltane Quest

08 Friday Jun 2012

Posted by Haloquin in Following Delight, Magic, Reflections

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Beginnings, challenge, Devotion, Faery, Faery Queen, Feyhearted path, Honesty, Intent, Journey, Living Life, Magic, musings, process, Strangeness of Life

The thread of fate weaves through the tapestry of life… like Ariadne’s thread leading you to your centre, to the heart of your life.

Beltane. The turning of the year from darkness to light.

A time of transformation, of beginnings, of springing into the future.

A time where that which you have dreamt over the long winter nights can enter the world…

It has been a magical month, Beltane coincides with May Day and this year May itself became the day on which the year turned!

It began with the full moon’s growing before May itself. A birthday party. Divination by the river… a call to sovereignty. My question was; how can I make a living doing what I love?

The answer; first you must be Queen.

Well, what do you do with an answer like that?

I committed to finding Sovereignty in my life, trusting that it would become clear. And so began my Beltane quest.

I wonder; what is the quest you are on right now? What is the quest waiting for you?

 

(Watch this space for the unfolding of the story…)

The Forest, The Dark Mother and Elephant snot (part 1)

11 Sunday Dec 2011

Posted by Haloquin in Following Delight, Magic, Reflections

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Devotional, Faery, Forest, Goddess, gratitude, Honesty, Living Life, Magic, Religion, Skande Vale

Skanda Vale Forest

The land is alive around us...

A three-part story of a pilgrimage to The Community of the Many Names of God – Skanda Vale.

Four of us walked through the darkening forest, a reddening full moon rising over the horizon as raindrops dripped upon our brows.

The trees were full of magic, the Spirit and spirits of the land – I could feel them around us, moving swiftly, watching.

I last stood on this land after an early morning Puja to Her, several years past. I’d stayed at Skanda Vale for two days with a friend and we’d been to every Puja each day. I was burnt out. The lack of sleep, the intensity of devotion-devotion-devotion in a language I did not really understand, the immense amounts of vegetarian curry (very tasty but not my normal diet!). We’d planned to stay a further day. I left that morning and said, even then, that I’d love to go back to visit the land if only I didn’t have to go to the Pujas too.

Last night, as I walked through that forest, I remembered why I fell in love with the land there.

Somewhere so alive my skin tingled and my heart overflowed with joy.

The twilight filtered through the trees and lit the way. I felt blessed to be able to feel the life that flowed through that place, recognising that the work I’ve been doing to open my awareness is not without success. I once thought myself as psychically sensitive as a brick, unable to sense the magic in the world around me. Now I step onto devoted land and almost fall over. Take heart, the things you long for can be developed over time.

I grinned the whole walk up through that beautiful, haunting forest and wondered what the Dark Mother, in the Dark time of the year, under a Dark Full Moon would share with us at the Temple that evening.

Skanda Vale’s site is here… and parts 2 and 3 of the story will be posted soon…

What happens when you’re honest?

29 Friday Jul 2011

Posted by Haloquin in Following Delight, Magic, Reflections

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Beginnings, choice, Commitment, creativity, Determination, gratitude, Heart, Honesty, Living Life, Magic, process, Strangeness of Life

Open your ears and listen. Take a breath and leap. Be vulnerable and open... and the world will respond in kind. This is magic.

The world fills with beauty.

I wrote a post last week about taking a risk and being open about myself in a situation where I’d normally have translated my language and edited things to hide those parts of my life which I fear rejection for…

This past fortnight I have practised not hiding those parts anymore…

I sang long and loud and in front of people, even when I messed it up…

I shared my dreams of pursuing a magic-based business… and openly claimed the title ‘Enchantress’ in front of ‘normal people’…

I spoke my truth, and got excited about the things I love…

And it worked.

No one reacted with derision. People asked questions, shared stories, made connections.

And I got even more excited and finally found some clarity on how to bring my passions together.

Magic happens when you’re honest, when you take a risk and open up…

What are you hiding from the world because you’re scared? What would happen if you shared it with the people around you?

What magic happens in the vulnerability of honesty?

 

What matters to you?

19 Tuesday Jul 2011

Posted by Haloquin in Following Delight, Reflections

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Beginnings, Determination, Heart, Honesty, Intent, Journey, Living Life, musings, Philosophy, process, Strangeness of Life

This week I’ve had the fortune to get on a management and leadership course, which began yesterday.

The organiser was talking to us about how the most important thing that comes out of the course is the connections you make (when is that not the case?!) and that this newly forming network can lead to opportunities.

It reminded me of a very simple fact – if I hide what truly matters to me and only share with the group the parts of my passions which I consider safe to be shared, like my desire to lecture in Philosophy, then that will be the only area in which opportunities can open.

The only way to follow all of my loves is to allow them all to be present in my interactions with people.

A scary thing, for me, to be risk being seen as nutty… but if I don’t take the risk, the doors won’t open even if they’re there. And if I hide the pagan elements in my life in case people reject me, or my love of art and music because I’m being ‘serious’ and I’m shy about sharing those things with strangers in person, then the opportunities that come up in the areas I am open about won’t allow room for those things either.

So I ask myself, and you, what matters so much that you’ll take a risk and speak openly of it in order to invite it further into your life?

Whats worth the risk?

Solstice and Cycles

29 Wednesday Jun 2011

Posted by Haloquin in Magic, Reflections

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

cycles, growing things, Honesty, Imperfection, Living Life, Magic, musings, paganism, process, Strangeness of Life

Sunna and Manni - Jotun Tarot

The Sun and the Moon have their cycles, and so do we... parts of society have changed their cycles, trying to be linear, but we are still part of nature, still cyclical.

When I first stepped onto this peculiar path of paganism, I discovered frequent references to the importance of the ‘Wheel of the Year’, the ‘Festivals’, and cycles.

I duly camped at Avebury for every festival one year, watched the moon, made altars for the festivals and discovered my Moon sign. And all around me my life went on. I found early on that the feeling of when the tides changed didn’t always match the dates in the books. I also found that the old stories of the festivals didn’t always match the patterns of my life.

I went through school and academia… the year begins in the autumn, at the harvest time. How could that match with the harvest festival which declared a completion? The ending that was a beginning was Samhain – Halloween, 2 months later! And my years ended at the Summer Solstice… leaving a space for holidays and playtime and freedom. Summer was a time that was not a time. My life did not match the cycles I was reading about.

But the natural world did.

I marked the solstices and equinoxes as astrological events.

I acknowledged the markers of the cross-quarter festivals as markers of what the natural world was doing.

And I counted myself lucky to not suffer from SAD!

The nature of our world now is such that, through technology, we can manage our environment to a degree that lets us work when it is dark outside, and start and finish projects independently of the green growing things. We are still dependent on natural cycles for our health and our food, of course, but our day-to-day life has been massively divorced from those rhythms.

Many of us have come to believe that we linear beings, not cyclical. Our technology allows us to work the same length day in winter as in summer, to protect some of our crops from the worst storms, and to avoid the direct consequences when things do go wrong. While we may feel a pinch when the prices rise due to scarcity, its nothing to what the people starving feel.

So society encourages us to push ourselves, to work too hard, too long in the winter. To keep up summertime productivity all year round. And we can, technically, do so. But our health suffers.

I’ve long noticed personal patterns, personal cycles, that effect my life, and not only the obvious ones. I always get excited about new projects in the autumn, especially around Samhain. I get tired on the day of the full moon, and energised during the dark moon, and become withdrawn during the waning moon. I have periods where I work best on visual arts, periods where I am obsessed with my studies, and periods where all I can do is write about the Fae or work on my website. And these times spiral round in huge loops…

I’ve been quiet on here recently. I’ve been in a inward cycle.

I can’t apologise, although I’ve felt a little guilty at points, but I’ve come to realise that I have to honour these cycles. I’m learning how the astrological patterns effect me, and how my natural rhythms flow, and I’m slowly figuring out ways to prepare for quiet times so I can keep up with my commitments.

Learning about personal cycles, and how the natural cycles effect me, is taking a long time, a lot of patience, and constant awareness. But its proving worthwhile. Knowing that I don’t always have the energy for sharing my internal processes means I can honour myself when that is the case. Knowing when that will happen means I can prepare in advance!

How do you cope with the conflict between societies attempts at keeping us linear, and our natural tendency towards cyclical patterns? Have you mapped how your personal cycles intersect with the cycles of the sun and the moon? How has that helped you in a practical way?

I’m writing this on the Longest day of the year, although I won’t be posting it till next week, since I know that I’ll be tired again then, and probably feeling quiet! As I say, I’m learning to prepare, to honour my own cycles, and to practice self-care while honouring my commitments. Its an interesting balancing act. How do you do it?

Being a Creative Philosopher in an Analytic World.

26 Thursday May 2011

Posted by Haloquin in All Posts, Creative Process, Following Delight, Philosophy, Reflections

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

choice, creativity, Determination, gratitude, Heart, Honesty, Imperfection, inspirations, Intent, learning, Living Life, musings, Philosophy, Strangeness of Life

Emerging

Many things make up who we are - what do you share and what do you keep precious from the world? When do you ignore the 'sensible' and leap into what you love?

How often have I tried to hide?

I know it would be safer to keep my head down, to keep my lunacy separate from the rational academia in which I’m slowly-slowly carving a place for myself, and yet I also know that to hide is to deny myself.

So I shut my eyes and I leap.

I see a scary thing ahead, and I take a deep breath and tell my Sensible Self to close her eyes… and then the moon-kissed heart of me steps off the cliff and trusts the wind to carry her.

It’s never dropped me yet.

I know as well as you do the risks of being seen as crazy – it’s a not-so-secret fear of mine, you know? – if they see me and dismiss me I’ll be left out in the cold. If they think I’m crazy they’ll turn me away… I’ll lose friends and opportunities and it’ll all be for nothing.

So says my Sensible Self. She has good reason to believe these things, and yet I know that even if the worst happens, the Wind will not drop me. At least, he will not drop me far!

I’ve friends who have seen me star-struck and moon-kissed and standing on edges. I’ve friends who’ve stood beside me as I’ve opened doors and boxes which Sensible Me says would be better left closed. In leaping I’ve found people who encourage me to fly, even in the most unexpected places.

Those who shake their heads and sigh do not need to know my heart, but as long as I follow it, the Wind will carry me when the ground falls out beneath my feet. Those that know what flying means will soar with me, even if they ride another breeze.

And only those that understand dreams of flight are worth sharing my secrets with. Only those who already share a spark will understand what I say.

And so I come full circle.

No longer do I hide, but neither do I need to tell everyone I meet my deepest, brightest secrets. That those lights guide me is no reason to announce it to the world.

My dreams, my passions, my obsessions filter into my academic work, and you’d be amazed at how often people ignore the bits they do not understand. It’s not easy to have a touch of the irrational in a world of rationality, but they feed each other and both grow stronger from it.

I am me. Every day I learn to be more me, I am always becoming, and I do not hide…

But I do keep secrets.

***

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Meet Halo

Snow Pixie

Welcome to my world!

Halo Quin is an author, a storyteller, and a practicing witch with a lifelong relationship with the spirit realm (faeries, deities, and the primal powers of land, sea, and sky, specifically) who aims to share magic through experience. Halo lives in wild West Wales, right by the roiling sea, and loves to sing, dance, and otherwise enchant through performance. She also runs the local storytelling circle, and an ADHD resource centre, and ultimately encourages self-knowledge, self-acceptance, self-healing, and self-enchantment through everything she does... leading to:

Beauty ~ Magic ~ Delight

Re-enchanting the world, one story, one song, one spell, at a time.

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