Tag Archives: process

Iron Pentacle – In Closing

17 Thursday Feb 2011

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This past week I’ve been writing posts on the points of the Iron Pentacle…

I have spoken of Sex, Pride, Self, Power and Passion in relation to this tool of self-transformation, within the context of the Reclaiming Tradition which has a strong focus on community. Each point connects to all the others, flowing into each other, feeding each other, strengthening each other. Each must be seen in relation to the others as nothing in this world is in isolation.

The 5 points can be meditated and mused on individually and in connection. How does my passion feed my lifeforce? How does my sense of who I am affect how I can act in the world? How does my ability to make choices feed into my ability to act on my passion in a healthy way, and to allow the world to feed me in return with joy?

The Iron pentacle can also be used as a diagnostic tool: throughout the day notice how you are at that moment; are you feeling good in yourself, or worthless, or puffed up with unwarrented self-importance? Are you feeling arrogant or powerless, or do you feel centered and powerful? Are you allowing lifeforce to flow cleanly through you, or are you holding too tightly, or metaphorically bleeding out all over the floor? How do you feel in relation to each of these points? And are they balanced and connected? Does your sense of place in the world reflect how you feel about yourself inside? And so on…

Finally, you can stand or lie with arms and legs held in a star shape and feel the points of the pentacle at each point of the star of your body. Feel the energy of each point and of each connection in your body. There are trances which work with the energy of the earth running along the lines of the Pentacle which you can also use that are along these lines.

Best of luck, and remember, these are all areas which can hold a lot of issues, so be gentle with yourself and gentle on the others around you for a while. This is said to be the work of a lifetime, there is no rush.

In Strength and Compassion,

~Halo x

Iron Pentacle – Passion

16 Wednesday Feb 2011

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Finally, on the Iron Pentacle, we come to the point of Passion…

What has happened to our world that means expressing how you feel is seen as weak?

What has happened to our world that means we settle for years of a life we are less than passionate about?

What has happened to our world that means we hide our passions from others and ourselves?

Passion is simultaneously seen as good and evil, due to its perceived chaotic nature. Crimes of passion are thought to happen when someone’s passion is out of control. Passions are thought to drive us, to ride us, to wear us out and make life unpredictable… it is safer to be boring and in control than to take a risk and follow our heart.

Passion, like each of the other points, includes more than one perspective. The point of Passion includes our passions / emotions, and what we are passionate about. Drive and direction.

Our emotions guide us through life, disclosing how we feel about choices, about situations, about people, and helping us to know what choices would feed us, which would drain us, and which we can let go of. Knowing how you really feel about any part of life allows you to make an informed choice based on how it will affect you and your happiness, as well as what you know and can rationalise about the situation.

Your feelings, those passions that live deep within your self, reflect who you are. Owning them as part of yourself, accepting them and expressing them in healthy ways makes it possible for you to be yourself with all parts of yourself on board. Denying what you feel, or constantly burying those emotions leaves you conflicted and acting in contradiction to what makes you happy, without knowing why.

And your passions, your emotions, show you what you are passionate about. Those things you would choose to do if there were no barriers, or that you long for, that inspire you and make you happy.

If you know, accept and express your emotions in healthy ways then you can follow your emotions to find that which feeds you, that which you are passionate about! Following your passion and acting on your passions lifts your mood, gives you strength and makes the world a better place. As you follow your heart you find the world shifting to make space for more of what feeds you, as you act on your passions you become more passionate!

We have a finite amount of time on this planet, in this life, doesn’t it make more sense to risk being happy than die only knowing tedium? Not to mention the health risks associated with bottling up emotion until it explodes or eats us from the inside!

What are you passionate about? What activity makes you smile all the way through from bones to sky? What do you do that you finish feeling happier than when you began?

Listen to your emotions, what are they telling you?

What is your Passion? What makes your heart sing?

Can you make some time for that this week, can you give yourself this as a gift? This thing that truly makes you feel good, that feeds and strengthens you, that you love?

Can you make time to be positively passionate today?

Feyhearted – Pixie Kiss 11 – Seeing Faeries without Sight

11 Friday Feb 2011

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This is the eleventh of a series of suggestions for re-enchanting your life, one pixie kiss at a time. The introduction is here, and you can watch the path unfold here.

I’ve always looked for faeries, and very rarely seen them.

I often feel them, however, or know that they are near.

It turns out that not everyone can translate their experiences into something visual, and that is ok. This means, however, that in a world which emphasises sight so much, we can overlook our own experiences in the pursuit of a pattern which does not suit us, as I did for a long time.

Always looking, rarely seeing, but I knew they were there. I knew there was something to see… when I finally gave up on seeing, I found them.

Don’t worry, then, if you cannot see them. They are still there.

Continue reading →

Retreats

08 Tuesday Feb 2011

Posted by in All Posts, Art Craft and Beauty, Creative Process, Philosophy

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Every time I come across mention of a creative retreat, I wish I was on one.

People talk of meeting other writers and spending a block of time just writing together, sharing stories and ideas and support, challenging each other and being there for each other. This appeals to me.

People talk of getting together with other artists to carve out a precious piece of time dedicated to creating art, honing skills, and immersing themselves in the creative process. This, too, appeals to me.

I love working with other people around, also working on the same kind of thing. Going on the university run Philosophy conference sets aside time in a beautiful place dedicated to just doing Philosophy and inspiring each other, and means that all sorts of things happen in writing and sparking ideas.

Maybe, then, instead of trying to set aside time to study each day I can plan a ‘private conference’ for myself, where I listen to philosophical podcasts, hunt down articles and offer up ideas for comment soemwhere like Facebook. Perhaps doing this will inspire me to dive back into my studies, and interacting with others will help me keep motivated?

Perhaps I could invite others over for creative afternoons, even if we just connect through Skype and blogs and Facebook? And perhaps, if no-one else is available, I can allow myself time for specific projects that I can get excited about in the anticipation-soaked wait… so half the reason, the retreat side of retreating, can at least be pressent.

I could join in on Play-date Tuesday, or workless Wednesday.

I could join the One World, One Heart giveaway to focus myself.

I could solicit interest here and now… Anyone up for getting together sometime? Either digitally or, even better, in person? Bring your creative project and I’ll bring mine, we can picnic in a park or make forts in a living room! Any other philosophy students out there? We can share interesting online talks, share summaries of our current pieces for inspiration and support, maybe even *gasp* get some discussion going?

Anyone else interested?

In the meantime, I’m going to experiment with reframing ‘study-sessions’ into ‘private conferences’ or retreats and see if I can get back into my studies by imagining they’re as fun as they are!

(I enjoy my studies while doing them, its getting started that I’m struggling with… bribery, time-limits, and making a schedule hasn’t helped so far, lets see if making a game of it will!)

Trusting

30 Sunday Jan 2011

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There is no such thing as coincidence.

Everything is connected.

The number of times this past year I’ve been worried about something, and the minute I let go and hand it over to Aumakua, my Godsoul and the Godsoul of the universe, when I hand it over to Spirit, God Herself, the Universe, when I just let it go and trust… and the solution arrives.

When I ask for help, it comes.

When I said: I don’t know how I’ll find a new home in the place that I love, but that is where I want to be… paths opened.

When I said: I don’t know how I can afford to live in Wales again, when there seems to be no work there, but it is what I choose and I trust that it will be ok… the next day a way for it to work arrives.

When I said: I have no idea how I can pay these bills and get through this month without landing in a mess… a cheque for a tax refund from 5 years ago arrived in my hand.

This is part of being a witch. I sit with myself and reach an understanding of who I am and what I Will. I make a choice. I Trust that it will all be ok. I step forward. The Universe steps with me.

And other people are doing the same, creating the world. Sometimes my choices are inc onflict with others. Often my choices are in conflict with what I actually Will because I’m not clear enough. I don’t ask for everything I need because of complexes and beliefs which get in the way. I compromise on what I’m askign for because I’m scared to ask for the big thing I actually want.

And I journal and muse and sit and listen. I breathe and connect and hope.

And I’m learning to trust.

Since I began on this path I’ve had message after message – let go. Trust. Leap.

I’m learning to, little by little.

And trust is rewarded in very practical ways.

I am so grateful. Big love to all those beings out there who guide me gently, who push me firmly, who point me at the cliff and remind me that I have wings to fly with.

 

 

***

For a practical discussion of a clearly laid out method for putting ego to one side, getting clear on what you want, and asking for it in a way that gets results, I’d recommend The One Command by Asara Lovejoy. A friend leant me a copy and reading it illuminated exactly what I’d been doing. This stuff works.

Becoming a… choosing to… leaping…

12 Wednesday Jan 2011

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Its a strange feeling, being between lives.

I’ve a good sense of who I am and what I want… its just making that choice, stepping, with both feet at once (a leap, really) into the future I’ve turned towards. It looks like I’ve chosen, but I’m not quite committed, not yet.

I’ve burned the bridge back, amicably but definitely.

I’ve been given, handed on a silver platter, an opportunity to make the transition easily, and it still feels so hard because I’m scared.

What if? What if?

I’m deep-down-in-my-very-core terrified. And I know its this way or nothing. It feels so right. I’m scared and certain, at the same time. Fear and desire, those dancing twins.

From the tension, as Thorn has taught me, can be born a new thing, a third thing, a proud thing. I can make a choice, and raise the new-born peacock high.

What am I choosing? What have I turned my caravan* towards?

I’ve chosen to move back to the green hills of Wales (though I’ve kept my job in England as a safety net), I’ve chosen to start writing more seriously, both academically and magically (see the Feyhearted blog for a weekly project which has been weekly for 6 weeks, and is scheduled to be weekly for another 2 weeks already. I’m not only continuing a project, I am actually ahead of deadline! Go me!). I’ve chosen to do what will make me happy, rather than follow the trail of shoulds that have been threatening for a year.

 

I successfully buried an important thing there. Something I don’t really belive but, look! See all the times I do it! I appear to be becoming a…

Writer.

Artist I get. Witch I get. Academic, student, dreamer… all things I’ve long accepted. I still ignore the label ‘writer’. Its important to me. I write all the time. More than I make art. And I have trouble with it. Despite having written a book. Having written many short stories. Having kept a sporadic blog (or 5) for years. Having written essays and dissertations… and having enjoyed the process.

So yes, I’ve chosen to be a writer. Among other things. Since, if you don’t do/know/love other things, what do you write about?!

There are other ways, other commitments I am in the process of making, like actually releasing my old home and becoming present in my new home. This one feels key though… I find, strangely, that I love to write, I long to.

A writer.

Right.

 

 

*Caravan. Yep. Havi is a pirate queen, Eileen has a sailboat. I like stability, I like having a home, I like freedom and colour. I have a gypsy caravan. I might talk more about this later. I might not. We’ll see.

Snowy Solstice

21 Tuesday Dec 2010

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Standing in the snow in my pyjamas as the clouds lining the sky lightened with dawn, I breathed in the beauty of the Solstice morn.

I gazed at the orange sky above, lit by streetlamps, and smiled at the branches, dark under the snow. I used to climb this tree with a book, just to spend time in its branches.

The sun is beginning its yearly return today, and though its cold and dark now, I know that each night will be shorter, each day longer… much as I love the night, I appreciate being able to walk home from work in daylight!

I’m thinking about goals, desires, choices.

I’m thinking about the movement from the dark into the light…

I understand now how thoughts slowly germinate in the dark, projects and understandings mull over in the depths of my mind until they rise into the light and a decision is made…

Its a slow process, knowing deep down what must be done, and waiting for that deep knowing to become strong enough to grow into choice and action.

It took five years of knowing that I would become vegetarian to actually doing it, because that knowing had to seep into my bones, had to become right on every level, had to become so ingrained in me that my conscious mind accepted it. There are ways to speed this process up, magic, spellworking, NLP, the ‘One Command’… and there is also space for this process to slowly unfold within me. Sometimes, this is the right way.

I am often impatient, and I am finally coming to know, in my bones, that its ok for things to take time, to become strong before they are exposed to the light. If that choice to become vegetarian hadn’t rooted in my bones, I’d have crumbled in the first week when I had to face family and travel and a funeral. If I don’t nurture that hope, that I express but cannot yet state, until it is so strong I cannot deny it, then it will fade in the harsh light of day.

Sometimes things can be acted on right away. Sometimes they need to germinate. And sometimes they germinate for too long and never grow.

Its a fine balance.

I hope I get it right.

How do you do it?

Always enough…

15 Wednesday Dec 2010

Posted by in Magic

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I learnt from Mum that there is always enough money.

Enough.

No more. And no less.

Funnily enough thats always been the case… at the points I think I might finally have managed my finances for long enough to start saving, or an unexpected bit of cash comes in, then something happens, and that little bit of extra money I was hoping for goes on that.

And conversely, when I set my heart on something, I say ‘this is what I’m doing, even though it’ll take me over what I’ve got coming in’, then just enough extra cash comes in to cover whats needed.

I’m currently living in my overdraft, over by a month each month. I’m doing better than several people I know, and many people country-wide. Though there is no real reason I should be living a month behind my wages, spending what I’ve earnt in the month I earn it. This is how it is, though I was previously spending all of what I earnt after I’d been paid it, its only been the past year that my overdraft has begun feeling like money – coincidentally this happened alongside my having to live out of it on a regular basis, so I’m not sure which came first!

So I always have enough. And I’m grateful, very very grateful… it’d be nice to shift this thinking though, to something with more of a safety net, and to see if my finances follow my thoughts.

I’m curious about how many other people have noticed this kind of thing in their own lives? What are your patterns of thought around money (or something else) and how does that match what happens… and, if you’ve tried it, has shifting your thinking helped?

Time for some spellworking, for sure! Time to shift how I think, and invite some money in…

Feyhearted – Pixie Kiss #2 – Stories

09 Thursday Dec 2010

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This is the second of a series of suggestions for re-enchanting your life, one pixie kiss at a time. The introduction is here, and you can watch the path unfold here. This post was originally posted here.

We started by making some space. Space for enchantment, space for the Fae.

Now we can continue this process, making more space in our lives and our minds, and charming ourselves with what we choose to attract.

Following the principle of magic that like attracts like, fill your life with the kinds of wonder and stories of the magic you choose to tap into.

Continue reading →

The Effect of Magic

04 Saturday Dec 2010

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I have a long history with magic… as a child I was always wandering off with the fairies, I prayed and I learnt stage magic (and bored/enchanted my family at the tender age of 6 with a full magic show). As I hit puberty I stumbled across Paganism, Witchcraft specifically (the books on UFOs and ghosts held little interest, but the ones which spoke of connecting with the natural world, and learning to affect change in your life, those I devoured!), and I found my feet on a map, one with many paths all roughly leading in the same direction.

And I’ve continued, honing my approach, finding my way, wandering along the edge of paths and trying to find people who think like I do.

The important question here, though, is why? Why do I keep on this path? Why do I hold seemingly-irrational beliefs? Why do I keep a space for the Gods in my home and my heart? Why do I spend time, energy and money tracking down events which speak of these things?

What, in short, are the benefits?!

Well, aside from the rare spellwork I do having rather literal outcomes (which could be coincidence but my pattern-making mind likes to think of as related), its had an effect on me as a peron.

I was blessed with loving parents who brought me up to believe in myself and have confidence to go with the intelligence I inherited. And a touch of arrogance. Thanks Dad 🙂

I’m also naturally fragile, shy, quiet, and suffer horrendously from stage-fright even when not on stage. Or I used to. The magical work I’ve done – reflection, meditation, energy work, self-examination and subsequent development of relationships between all my parts, constant attempts at self-awareness, ritual-work… all these things and more – helped me to feel sure in myself around others. I might not know what to say in daily social situations, but I do know that I’m a person in my own right who doesn’t need to make small talk to be accepted. My friends accept that I’m weird, and I accept that they are too.

Its helped me to recognise when arrogance or insecurity threatens, and to know that that is whats going on. I can then use that information to act in a way of my choosing (at least, I can sometimes, life-long processes here, you know?).

My magical work has helped me to map out the locations I want to pass on my journey through life, and has taught me that I want to experience each step.

It also taught me that I’m not perfect. Important for a Leo to know. And, it taught me that thats ok. I have the confidence to speak out when I think something is wrong at least some of the time, and I have the humility to know that sometimes the other person has a point, even if I still disagree with them!

I guess what I’m trying to say is that I have greater self-awareness than I used to, and I value that. I also have tools to deal with situations where I notice I’m behaving in ways that don’t feel right to me. I’m gaining integrity, and I’m stronger. Still soft, and yet more able to cope with knocks. I cry less, am happier in myself, and can ignore people who are simply being mean without taking their words personally.

Magic has also encouraged me to challenge myself, so, for example, I took drama A-level to face my stage-fright, and it worked.

In all the ways magic has touched my life, it has helped me to grow, to become more whole, to engage with the world and my own life. It has helped me relax my need for control over my life (somewhat, I still panic when I’m feeling powerless) and has helped me to find more power in myself in my life.

The map is not the territory, many magicians say. Well, no, but a good map helps when you set out on an unexplored path, and each life is exactly that… and magic is a tool kit for navigating the terrain, a tool kit with many maps…

Not only that, but it has a phone which you can use to call for help, or guidance with, or that you can be called on when you need a good kick up the arse.  At the other end are the Gods and guides and Guardians. For which I am grateful, even though I’m not quite sure what they want from me yet!